17-year-old stepdaughter accuses stepmother of pretending to be poor because she refused to buy her a $1200 purse: 'I know you and Dad make bank'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Nov 19, 2025 8:00 PM EST

Just because she has $1200 does not mean she's going to spend it on her spoiled, rotten stepdaughter.

When you're young, it's easy to be incredibly juvenile about money. If you have it, you spend it! If you have the money to spend on it, you can certainly afford it! Young spoiled kids have little to no sense of how much work (or dumb luck) goes into acquiring a large sum of money. They might have a rudimentary understanding that the way to keep money is not to spend it, but they don't have the discipline to put that into practice. 

Some parents choose to spend a lot of their hard-earned money on their spoiled rotten kids, and that's their prerogative. You might think it's asinine for your coworker's daughter to have 50 American Girl dolls, considering that's $5,000 that could go towards her college fund. But if you're not the parent, you don't have a say in how parents spend their money on their kids! There is a middle ground between being a parent to a child and a complete stranger to them, and this stepmother is living in that middle ground with her stepdaughter.

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  • Woman holding a cream colored handbag in front of her face
    via Andrej Lišakov (Unsplash+)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • The teen in this story desperately wants a designer bag, but her stepmom refuses to buy it for her. Instead of getting a job to pay for it herself, the teen cries to her dad about it, and he criticizes his wife for her frugal choice.

  • My stepdaughter accused me of ‘playing poor’… because I didn’t want to buy her a designer bag.

    I (41F) married my husband (45M) five years ago. He has a daughter, "Maddy," who's now 17. Her mother is quite wealthy and spoils her. I don't judge, that's their dynamic.
    via u/Strong_Shape8973
  • My husband and I are comfortable but we live intentionally. We save aggressively for retirement, travel once a year, and don't buy luxury goods unless they truly matter to us.
    via u/Strong_Shape8973
  • Womens sunglasses and blackbag with watch and iPhone 6
    via Marissa Grootes

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Last week, Maddy asked me to buy her a $1,200 designer bag she saw on TikTok. I said no, not because I couldn't afford it, but because I didn't think it was appropriate for a teenager to have something that expensive unless her own parent bought it.
    via u/Strong_Shape8973
  • She rolled her eyes and said, "Stop pretending you're poor. I know you and Dad make bank." I was stunned. I calmly told her budgeting isn't "being poor," it's just... responsible.
    via u/Strong_Shape8973
  • She got upset, told her dad I was "judging her lifestyle," and now he wants me to apologize for "making her feel bad.” I refused because I didn't shame her; I just said no.
    via u/Strong_Shape8973
  • He thinks I should "keep the peace." I think he's enabling her entitlement. AITA for not apologizing?
    via u/Strong_Shape8973
  • A woman with dark hair wearing a green shirt
    via Dmitrii Shirnin (Unsplash+)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Zestyclose-Height-36 Sounds like stepdaughter is in need of a financial literacy class, and building her awareness that you don't want her to have to support you when you are old.
    via u/Zestyclose-Height-36
  • Scorp128 Why wasn't she hitting up Dad to buy the purse for her? Or her Mom? She was rude and disrespectful. She doesn't need to be counting other peoples money. Dad should be mortified that his daughter acted this way, not trying to get an undeserved apology because princess had her feelings hurt being told no.
    via u/Scorp128
  • gdognoseit How else can she cause problems between op and her dad.
    via u/gdognoseit
  • YesterdaySimilar2069 Yep, OP – feel free to apologize to her after she's completed a semester of personal finance, gone over your retirement accounts and then made a tour of the local homeless shelter and checked out the below poverty level elder care facility near your home. Kidding, but only barely. If she's 17, she can get a job to buy that bag.
    via u/YesterdaySimilar2069
  • HellaShelle I mean, aside from letting her see their retirement accounts, I think I like your plan
    via u/HellaShelle
  • oldcreaker Funny he wants you to apologize - but he's not buying the bag for her, either. He's made you the fall guy so he doesn't have to say no to her.
    via u/oldcreaker
  • Agostointhesun I get the feeling he expects the apology to come with the bag... because his perfect princess deserves everything she wants!
    via u/Agostointhesun
  • flaminkle She's 17- her "lifestyle" isn't hers, she's funded by the adults in her life.
    via u/flaminkle
  • KelsarLabs Tell him to give you a divorce, just because it will give you peace.
    via u/KelsarLabs
  • gemmygem86 I hope your finances are separate and your credit is locked down I foresee your money being gone and credit ruined
    via u/gemmygem86

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Tags

family drama stepmother poor spoiled rotten brat stepmom stepdaughter spoiled rich dad expensive spoiled rich people daughter too expensive money rich Father
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